Anonymous asked: i'm honestly freaking out right now. by accident, i just found out that one of my best friends has depression and has self-harmed. she doesn't know that i know and she's been deliberately keeping it a secret. i have no idea what to do. i want to help in some way but i'm scared to let her know what i know....

You don’t have to let her know in order to help, just be there for her. Be the best friend you can be, show her you care, listen to her, remind her she can always speak to you about anything, and surprise her with nice little gifts to show you really care.  Like if she has a big test coming up she’s stressed out about, bring her cookies or something and offer to help her study.  Hopefully her seeing how invested you are in the friendship will help her realize she isn’t alone/she’ll open up to you <3

Anonymous asked: I have these two friends. they're getting closer and closer. I don't really have time to see them much because of my weekend schedule. It's cleared out so I'm free for much of the spring, but they're doing this play together. they'e going to spring break together and they're going to the same high school next year. I've tried to work my way back in by initiating hangout sessions and stuff, but even when it's just me and one of them, the other girl just comes back into the convo. I'm so left out.

Maybe try talking to one of them about it? Just try saying “I feel as if I’m left out whenever I’m with you two. I feel like we’re all three really good friends but when we’re all together, I end up feeling like the third wheel.  I know I’m busy and it’s hard to hang out with you guys all the time but I want us to be how we used to be” or something like that! You can also broaden your horizons and look for new friends :) New friends are always fun! Best of luck <3

Anonymous asked: you give the best advice<3 you are my favorite advice blog and i don't know why you don't get a million asks a day:)

thank you so much! We actually have 3 different people answering the questions. So you get different types of answers. :)

Anonymous asked: so i'm going into highschool in the fall and at my school theres half of us going to one school and half of us going to another. a lot of my friends are going to the other school, and i'm scared i'll drift from the ones that are still going to be going to school with me. i'm afraid we won't have any classes together or lunch together and we'll stop talking and i'll be kind of friendless:/ sorry i know this sounds lame hahaha...:)

No it isn’t!!! Everyone has that fear! Don’t worry about it! You’ll still be able to text them, see them in the halls (you’ll have more time in between classes than you think), and you have the weekends to hang out with them on! There also is still the chance you’ll have a class with them! Also, take the opportunity of not seeing them as much to have new friends :)

Anonymous asked: (cont): I'd like to at least be included in some of the stuff i guess? like i have a few friends who always go off with this other group and drink and hook up with people and stuff, or they just hang out, but I'm never included in any of it. i guess mostly because I'm not the party type, but how do i let them know id like to be included once in awhile without it being awkward? and how do i not be awkward about the whole never hooked up with anyone thing? thank you! you give the best advice :)

I didn’t get the first half of this but I’ll try my best to answer without it! First of all, I know exactly what you mean. I’m in the same position, I’m not the partying type so a lot of times I don’t get invited to parties even though I wouldn’t mind going.  Maybe just ask them if you can come? Or talk to one of your friends in that group that you’re closer with and be like “I feel like a lot of the time I’m not invited to go to parties with you because I don’t seem like the partying type, but I really would like to go” and then they should invite you the next time! As for hooking up, who cares! It really doesn’t matter, it won’t be awkward unless you make it awkward.  You can hook up with a guy there if you want BUT do NOT do anything you don’t want to do :) I hope it all works out for you! <3333 If they keep not inviting you, I suggest you find a different group of friends though, people who care about having you around <3

Anonymous asked: hi :) so I think I might be falling for this guy..I just asked him to our sadies dance (where girls ask the guys) and he said yes! he is super sweet and nice but I honestly really don't know him all that well...how do you think I can get to know him better without being awkward or coming off as too strong (considering i just asked him to the dance)? I don't have any classes with him and i don't know what to do! thank you! :)

aww well first of all, congratulations for having the guts to ask him AND him saying yes!!! considering the fact he said yes, he is probably interested in you too (at least as a friend).  Try getting his number and texting him or facebook chatting him saying you’re excited for the dance! Let the conversation flow and be casual from there! Talk to him more in school, just be yourself :) Try to find opportunities for you two to hang out! Let’s say you two are talking about a movie you both love, you can casually be like “we should totally watch it together, that’d be so fun!” and see what he says!! You can do it <3 Best of luck! Keep me updated!!

Anonymous asked: My ex and I broke up about a year and a half ago but we ended on good terms and are still friends. He started dating another girl a few months later and we talked sometimes. I miss him a lot and a lot of feelings have resurfaced especially now that him and his girlfriend broke up. I texted him last night and we talked for a little bit but then he stopped answering me. I want to text him again and at least become good friends again at least but I dont want to sound annoying, what should I do?

Hmm this is tricky.  I’m really sorry about all of that :/ You can always try just smiling and saying hi at him in school and occasionally texting him every two days or so.  However, you can also be honest with him.  Say something like “I miss the really great friendship we had, how are you?” or something like that.  Just don’t text him all the time, be casual about it even if you’re freaking out on the inside! Best of luck <3

Anonymous asked: lately one of my good friends is becoming more distant. she stopped talking to me and texting me and we still hang out with the same group of people and stuff and she is the same with everyone but me and i dont really know what is going on. i still want to be friends with her but i dont know if theres something i did to make her not want to be friends with me anymore. i really dont want to lose her we were so close up until like a month ago and now i dont know what to do:/

You have to talk to her! Try and find a time to hang out with her and talk to her.  If you can’t hang out, then text her (even though this should be done in person).  Say to her “I feel as if we’re growing apart and that saddens me because you’re one of my good friends, did something happen?” and it’s up to her to tell you and hopefully you two will be able to fix things <3 If she doesn’t really answer you or tells you she doesn’t want to be your friend, she’s missing out.  She just lost a really great friend who cares about them a lot.  However, I really hope the talk goes well…you can do it <3

Anonymous asked: omg i'm sososo happy (this is the awkward girl trying to get the guys number) today my crush and i ended up sitting next to each other in one class, and for once i was totally myself and we talked the whole time and did stupid flirty things but omg im so happy for once! working on that number still though hehe:) thanks a lot for the help:)

AHHHH I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! I’m also so very proud of you, good job girl!!!!! <3 I’m so happy for you! Keep me updated, best of luck!

Anonymous asked: OMG AHH my crush is online on facebook should i chat him? what do i say? and i dont really expect you to answer right away just like venting my inner freakout sesion sorryxx

have you two talked before? it doesn’t hurt to chat him! a simple “hey! what’s up?” or to be more casual “what’s the ____ homework?” if you have a class together works :) go for it!

Anonymous asked: thank you so much you give the best advice<3

You’re so so so welcome <3

Anonymous asked: i swear i am the most awkward person ever. hahaha so im starting to like this guy a lot, but whenever he tries to talk to me i have no clue what to say and kill off any potential conversation. i just cant think of something good tot alk to him about, and i want to ask himf or his number or something but i dont want to like be weird about it like i would as in a just-friend way. if you have any tips it would help so much thanks a billion<3

You just have to be friendly, “it’s only awkward if you make it awkward”.  Just start with a casual “Hi” and work up to a “How’s your day?” and keep it going from there! Maybe try chatting him on facebook or something and then when you have to go be like “this conversation was great, maybe we could continue it later?” and if he says yeah you can be like “Okay, can i have your number then?” you can also flirt your way so he asks for it from you :) You just have to be friendly and keep talking to him, he’ll love you!

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Boy’s-Phone-Number-in-Grade-School

Anonymous asked: same problem here VVV but with this guy i'm myself. it's just that i feel like i sound lame && i feel like i ignore him too much (i'm not trying to ignore him, its just i'm really shy.) i've asked him sooo many things about school that probably by now he thinks i'm a nerd. not cool. is it okay to always be the first one to come up to him? i feel like i come to strong and then i completely ignore him. it's not like i'm mad at him.. i just don't to be one of those creepy stalker chicks that's all.

I totally get what you’re saying, it’s like an inner conflict that you have with yourself trying to figure out what to do! It’s okay to be the first one to come up to him and talk but don’t do it everyday, maybe talked to him every two or three days.  Don’t necessarily ignore him but don’t give him all the attention you normally do on the days you don’t initiate conversation.  If he seems to be interested, he’ll notice and try to talk to you! Honestly though, if it continues to be all you and he makes no effort, I’d suggest moving on because you deserve someone who comes up and talks to you too/is interested back <3

tellaheartsyou asked: hey! youprobablygetthisalot but, there's this boy at my school that i really like.. the problem is, he's an upper classman. i'm a freshman and he's a junior; we've talked a couple times but i always back off 'cause i don't wanna seem too clingy and obsessive. when i talk to him i can't help the nervousness and so i blank out && well that also results to me not wanting to see him or talk to him... hah. but anyways, what should i say to him? i don't want him to think i'm dumb... help pleaaaaaaase

Well first of all, don’t worry about him being an upper classman! Be yourself and he’ll loooove you! Well, just smile and be friendly.  Talk about school (literally easiest thing to talk about) or ask him about things that are commonly known he’s involved in (if he plays a sport and most know/he’s told you, ask about it)! Even a simple “how’s your day going?” is good because hopefully his response will give you more follow up questions to ask to keep the conversation going! Don’t be nervous, he’s only a human - take a deep breath and be your wonderful self <3

Anonymous asked: is it normal to finger yourself?

Well, I mean, people do it so yes, it’s normal! You’re not irregular or weird for doing so.  It’s just something that, if people do it, they keep it to themselves which may be why you haven’t really heard of other people doing it! I assure you, you’re normal :)